Struggling With Parenting? Here’s What We’ve Learned: You Are Not Alone

It’s hard to believe that it’s been one year since we launched How Imperfect Parents Lead Great Families. As self-published authors, Monica and I had no idea what to expect. A couple of thousand books, many positive reviews on Amazon, contact from several prominent figures and authors, and many speaking events later, we sit here humbled by the support we’ve received.

However, the most rewarding part of this journey is what we’ve learned from others — that struggling with parenting and being an imperfect parent seems to be the norm.

Countless parents have reached out to us through emails, phone calls, and/or in person. We’ve been blessed to have others share their stories with us, and tell us that our story gave them comfort. We all have our stories and we all have our struggles. There’s no perfect mom, no perfect dad, and no perfect family.

Struggling With Parenting? It’s OK!

In life, the question isn’t what we learn, but what we do with the information we gain. That is something Monica and I really learned as we heard the stories of many different parents and families. Those stories — and the wisdom and advice within them — have helped us become better parents. Not only that, they’ve shown us that we all just need to talk more, in a positive, family-focused way.

Let’s face it, when we get together with our friends, it’s not to talk about real issues and share advice, it’s to complain and vent. And, yes, both men and women do this! What we should be doing (and what we’ve been doing as we’ve interacted with all of you), is to be open and honest. To say, “this is what I’ve got going on and I’m struggling with it.”

A true feeling of calm comes from realizing that we all are going through something and all of it is normal. When we are with our closest friends and confidants, we don’t have to just share the good parts and brag. It’s OK to show vulnerabilities, seek advice, and share our experiences, good and bad. If you start doing this with your friends, I guarantee you’ll all walk away in a better frame of mind.

With that said, I have to make one final point. If you find yourself in a situation where you are the one a friend is seeking advice from, remember that while we’re all struggling with parenting, every home and family is different. Help your friend work through their issues and struggles, don’t just tell them how you do it.

Again, we want to thank everyone who has taken the time to share their feedback and stories. This has truly been a humbling journey and we look forward to the next chapter.


For more helpful information and guidance, check out our book, pocket guide, blog, and downloadable parenting resources.

Author: Dale W. Vernon
Dale, a business and investment advisor and professed imperfect father of three children, is co-author of How Imperfect Parents Lead Great Families. He is a frequent speaker about the importance of establishing family values, creating a culture of communication in your home and being an intentional parent that understands the importance of being the best example you can for your children.
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